Other essays on this theme

Essay: "Psychic Experience"

Listen Up, Weightlifters

I once saw a little guy rip his pectoral trying to bench 225 lbs. It was not much to see on the outside: just an ugly, huge bruise. ON the inside, though, it was a gory mess. They had to cut him open and sew his pec back together. The rip was all raggedy and healed with a lot of bumps, wads, and cysts. He was out of the body building business for about 3 months and even when he returned, his strength was never even. Now he wishes that he hadn't pushed himself so far so fast.

Other weightlifting numbskulls still try it though. I have witnessed fanatics building muscle so quickly that it tears their skin. Listen up, weightlifters: prison is not as scary as they told you in the county jail. You really don't have to rush to plump up in prison to keep the child molesters out of your butt and gullet! Most of us are not sex maniacs and perverts and homosexuals; most of us are just idiots like you who got our asses in a crack. It's nothing to get mental about.

-James Bauhaus